firsttofreedom | Locked to bloodsinging

Entry tags:

[were!stiles - bloodsinging]

Locked to bloodsinging

Characters: Isaac, Stiles
Date/Time: 2.15pm, Friday
Setting: All over Beacon Hills and then Stiles' house.
Summary: Isaac starts scenting a familiar someone he didn't think he'd be seeing any time soon.
Rating: TBD
Status: Open to Stiles
Warnings: TBD

He'd been headed out onto the lacrosse field when he smelled it; a familiar scent that was both comforting and confusing and he'd dropped his lacrosse gear there and turned to follow it. He headed towards the forest first, stopping every now and again to scent the air.

When he reached the end of the trail, he stopped. Looking up at the Stilinski house, Isaac arched a brow in confusion. This could be right. Stiles hadn't been here in... years. But it was Stiles' scent and it was at his old house. He moved around the house until he stood below Stiles' window, and then, in what was a familiar act -he'd insisted on keeping an eye on Stiles' dad with the teen long gone-, Isaac scaled the wall and snuck in through the window.

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"You were in love with Lydia! I don't say anything because... I figured it would be useless." Isaac ducks his head, avoids Stiles' gaze while the Omega spoke, unwilling to face the truth in the words he was saying.

He shakes his head. "I didn't see the point any more, after you'd left. I didn't think you cared about us. You were pack, we all cared about you. And then you took off... So we-I figure you didn't care anymore." The words are as jumbled and repetitive as the ones swirling around in his head and he's not even sure it makes sense. But he has to tell Stiles anyways.

"If you are going to say this stuff, look at me." It almost came out as a growl, but Stiles could smell the truth on him...but he wanted to see it.

"I left because I cared so damn much, I didn't want to see any of you get hurt. You'd been through enough--I was just...I was just a big problem that I didn't think anyone should have to deal with." Stiles sighed, finally pulling his hand away from Isaac's chest.

"And yeah, I was in love with my idea of Lydia--but you had to have known that I thought you were attractive. You have a werewolf nose too. I didn't back then."

Blue eyes shot up then, meeting Stiles' brown ones and holding. He couldn't help the way his stomach flip-flopped at the tone of the Omega's voice, and yet it made him nervous at the same time and he had to fight to keep his gaze up.

"It may have been a problem, but it didn't make you any less important. We'd have helped you deal with it. We're tougher than you give us credit for; we could have handled it."

His eyes followed that hand as it moved away, briefly, before finding Stiles again. "I walk into the corridor, or the grocery store or the gas station and the scent of arousal is always there. How was I to know it meant any more? If it even did. You can find someone attractive without being attracted to them." After all, Isaac found Erica and Scott and Lydia, even Jackson and Derek attractive, but he didn't feel anything more than platonic for them.

"Yeah well I didn't know if you guys could." Stiles shook his head. "And I didn't want to risk it--I didn't want someone getting hurt because of me." Not after what happened with Scott, with Derek.

Moving to sit back on his bed, he stretched out his legs, trying to get some of the nervous energy out of his frame, hands flexing into the sheets.

"You could have just asked. You know, what normal people do when they like someone." Stiles just wished Isaac had asked.

"And you weren't willing to try, to let us try." Isaac watches Stiles on the bed, eyes taking him in. There's changes, the ones that come with being a wolf, but his scent is mostly the same. He'd never had any doubts that Stiles was attractive, but the bite had enhanced certain features and he's downright beautiful now.

Isaac hadn't expected all of his buried feelings to come back so hard so fast once he'd seen him.

"I wasn't... I wasn't willing to risk rejection. I wouldn't have been able to handle it." And neither would his wolf, but he ignored what that might mean.

"No, I wasn't. Because if trying meant that one of you got hurt again, or died because of me?" Stiles snorted, running his hands through his thick hair. This was why he shouldn't have come back. They couldn't understand why he left--why he had needed to leave. Why it had been so damn important.

Staying quiet for a moment, Stiles forced himself to calm, not wanting to claw up his bedsheets, or wolf out. His own wolf liked the idea of Isaac liking him--but recoiled over the fact that the other boy wasn't even able to tell him.

"Yeah well you should have risked it. Trust me, I doubt you would have been rejected." Stiles, back then, had just wanted someone to care about him--genuinely. And hell, maybe if Isaac had told him...he would have had an anchor, and none of the shit that went down, would have. Maybe he never would have left.

"Maybe you should have given us more credit." It's not meant to be a dig, but he knows it comes out that way, knows his tone of voice says that it is. Isaac can't bring himself to feel guilty for it, though, not after two years of them all wondering what they did wrong that Stiles would rather run than stay with them.

He watches as the Omega works to calm himself, and does the same; it wouldn't do either of threm well to lose control and wolf out. They're already both frustrated and while Isaac's control has increased since Stiles left, it's still not perfect.

"You showed no interest in me. Nothing that would have suggested that risking it was a good idea." He shakes his head, hands slapping against his thighs in irritation. "And besides, would you have been accepting me because you wanted me or just because you wanted someone and I was the first person who came along? Because that? That's worse than rejection."

"Yeah well maybe I should have. But I was a stupid kid back then." Stiles bit back, shaking his head. "I learned my lesson, trust me." Isaac had no idea what he'd been through--Stiles had to keep reminding himself of that; he was judging things from his perspective, just like he was doing from his own.

He needed to remember he'd grown the fuck up.

"I don't know, Isaac! We could have figured it out!" He sighed, leaning back against the headboard. "Look this is a stupid conversation to be having. I can't change the past, okay? Judging me over it isn't going to help things."

He just wanted to come home.

"We all were. Doesn't change it." The words are harsh, brought on by the left over feelings of betrayal and abandonment the pack had felt after Stiles had left. But the fight is gone from it, like he just can't be bothered arguing over it anymore. Isaac may have changed, but confrontation was still not his strong point.

Isaac ducked his head again, backing further into the corner as if he could sink back and become one with the walls behind him. "I missed you. Probably more than I had any right to."

"Yeah I know that, okay? I can't take it back. So just stop, please."

Stiles watched Isaac for a moment, before pulling up his legs to his chest, resting his chin on his knees." You have no idea Isaac..." He chuckled bitterly, chewing on his lip. "I spent only six months with another pack, learning how to control myself. The rest of the year and a half? I was alone." Completely and utterly. To be an Omega is to be alone. In all the terrifying things that meant.

"I missed you, too." He missed everyone.

Isaac hesitates for only a brief moment before deciding that enough has been revealed now that anything else isn't so odd and he approaches the bed, climbing onto it and sitting cross leg in front of the Omega. "So tell me."

Stiles looked up, watching Isaac move to sit on the bed. His wolf feels cagey for a moment, but relaxes, enjoying the smell of the other wolf around him. He didn't think on that, though, but on the other werewolf's words.

"Where do you want me to start? I...spent six straight months running. Didn't know what the hell I was doing." Stiles was surprised that he even survived, frankly, "Ended up in Canada...ran into a pack up there that had completely cut themselves off from humans a long time ago." They had found him, half starved, more feral than human. "They took me in, helped me gain control of myself...taught me things about what I was, now." And how to deal with it.

"And what were you? What happened when you turned?" It was a question they'd all asked; what had gone so wrong that Stiles had ended up more out of control than all of them. Stiles out of all of them.

He wants to reach out, touch, the way he does with Erica and Boyd and Scott and Derek and sometimes even Jackson. But he doesn't. Stiles isn't pack -yet- as much as he was and as much as the rest of them wanted him to be and he isn't sure it would be welcomed.

"They didn't...know completely. I went feral, for some reason. It's rare, but happens." Stiles laughed bitterly, looking down at his hands. "Means something's too wild in me. Sometimes people who shouldn't be werewolves don't die...they just become like me." Why not? There were Kanimas, after all. Why couldn't Stiles just be a freak, too.

"...they wouldn't let me stay with them. I've been--alone the past year."

"You never could do anything by half, could you Stilinski? Just because it didn't work out for you straight away, doesn't mean... There's nothing wrong with you, Stiles."

This time he doesn't hesitate. He reaches out to shove his hands into Stiles' squeezing firmly. "You should have come back home sooner. There's always a place for you here." Derek would have no choice in it, if for whatever reason he got his Alpha knickers in a twist over it. Too many of them would welcome home back with open arms.

"Nope, got to go full on freak, these days." Stiles let out a little huff sound, not entirely convinced at Isaac's declaration that there was nothing wrong with him. There was, and there wasn't really any way for him to forget it.

When Isaac' moves to grab his hands, he stiffens, his claws almost sliding out, unused to contact. He relaxes almost immediately, squeezing back. "Yeah, I just...I just wasn't sure."

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